Liverpool were rampant against a terrible Fulham side with two goals in each half sealing a comfortable win
Thank you for all your Christmas song emails and apologies I could not use them all. There were just too many (and some of them were abysmal). Hope you all have a great Christmas. See you on the other side. Cheerio!
All over at Anfield. An awful Fulham side dispatched clinically. Liverpool move into the top half.
Short corner. Enrique. Pullback. Suarez. Sidefoot. Goal.
90+2 min: Rodallega sends a superb free-kick rattling onto Reina's post.
90+1 min: … horribly shanked to the near post by Karagounis. Three added minutes to play.
90 min: Dejagah sees his shot deflected wide for a corner …
88 min: Fulham are ending on something of a high, but it's hardly a grandstand finish. More a small-section-of-terracing-behind-the-goal finish.
86 min: … Suarez sends in a raking drive, Schwarzer turns it wide.
85 min: Karagounis brings Sterling down on the edge of the box. Yellow card and a dangerous free-kick …
84 min: Riether swings in a cross. Turned away. Tum-te-tum.
83 min: Carragher replaces Lucas.
82 min: And the Bulgarian repeats the trick from inside the area.
81 min: A rare sight here – the lesser spotted Fulham attack. Berbatov sends a shot straight at Reina from distance.
80 min: A tumbling Suarez goes past three Fulham defenders on the edge of the box, but Schwarzer comes out to block his shot. The Cottagers are increasingly desperate for the final whistle.
79 min: … swung in low by Suarez, helped on by Johnson and banged at goal by Gerrard. Schwarzer makes a decent stop.
78 min: Dejagah clatters Enrique and picks up a booking. Dangerous free-kick this …
77 min: Brace yourselves. "To the tune of the opening two lines of Slade's Merry Xmas Everyone," begins Ned Wall ominously. "Ari, Hangeland, ter Stegen on Fitz Hall. Isla, Clyne, McEverly, Draxler, Alan Ball …"
75 min: Sterling plays a great little one-two with Suarez then becomes the meat in a sandwich in which the bread is played by two Fulham defenders. The Kop screams for a penalty … but Mark Clattenburg is unmoved.
74 min: Rodgers continues to shuffled his pack – Shelvey (who has had an excellent game) off, Allen on.
73 min: Sterling's first contribution is to see his dinked volley deflected wide off Aaron Hughes.
72 min: Fulham have more or less settled for 3-0. And so have Liverpool.
70 min: The newly-contracted Raheem Sterling replaces Suso.
69 min: Downing steps inside and is a couple of yards away from the top corner with a vicious, swerving strike.
67 min: 'Silenzi! Knight! Boli! Knight!' delivered Brolin-Dahlin-Brolin-style by Barry Davies" writes D Wacaster. These are getting out of hand. Johnson wangs a shot narrowly wide.
64 min: A clever little flick from Dejagah almost puts Frei in. Fulham have crept back into it a touch, so much so that Brendan Rodgers has just been filmed making that circular get-the-ball motion with his hands.
63 min: "Frimpong Merrily On High," suggests Paul Brown. "Silent Zat Knight," suggest 1,057 correspondents.
61 min: Dejagah slaps a cross into Reina's hands. The fact that has been about as good as it's got for Fulham must be pretty depressing for the 900-odd damp souls in the away end.
60 min: Berbatov zips a pass into Rodallega but Skrtel does well to deal with the danger.
58 min: … Rodallega is an inch away from a free header, but can only get the faintest of hairy touches onto the ball.
57 min: "We're walking in McClair?" toots Stephen Thorn. Frei wins a corner …
55 min: Shelvey sees his shot deflected over. This could be five or six by full-time.
54 min: The talented Kerim Frei replaces Richardson. "Vlaar of Wonder," suggests Peter Oh. Is that the sound of a barrel scraping?
53 min: Glen Johnson goes into the book for a daft chop on Richardson.
Stewart Downing scores his first league goal for Liverpool! He's unplayable! Or, at least, Riise and Fulham are making him appear unplayable. This time he cuts inside, Riise dangles a leg out like a donkey attempting to shake a fly from its hind quarters, and the winger sends in a thumping effort that screams past Schwarzer.
50 min: Johnson works space inside the box, but Schwarzer grabs his cross. "Have we really not had Santa Bébé yet?" enquires Richard Wood. We have, and more than once, but that song creeps me out so I've tried to ignore it.
49 min: … Enrique's eventual delivery is punched away not entirely convincingly by Schwarzer.
48 min: Liverpool force an early corner …
47 min: "We Weiss Euell Amauri Bongo Christ mas," writes ambition's Felix Wood, who has just melted my brain.
46 min: Fulham can't be as bad again. Can they? Downing's shot is deflected and it drops invitingly to Suarez who really should score with his volley from six yards out. Can they?
Peep! Off we go again. My flabber will not be gasted – Rodallega has replaced Kacaniklic for Fulham.
Andrew Thompson: "Have yourself Shaun Derry Little Christmas."
Will Loach: "David Silva Bells."
Kevin O'Connor: "Driving Preud’Homme for Christmas."
Ben Stanley: "We Three Frings of Orient Are"
Alec Austin: "Happy Xmas (War Is Overmars)"
Matt Shelton: "A Spackman came travelling."
PEEP! PEEEEP! And that's half-time. Martin Jol has a Christmas miracle to work.
45 min: Liverpool have played well, but they've benefited from a Fulham side who have been frankly appalling.
42 min: Suarez is in behind once more, but can't squeeze his shot past Schwarzer from the tightest of angles.
41 min: If Hugo Rodallega isn't on the pitch at the start of the second half I'll be flabbergasted.
39 min: Suso should make it 3-0 but drags his shot well wide from inside the area. "How about the 12 David Mays of Christmas, as you just know that he'll somehow manage to shoehorn his way into every Christmas photo, even with the 11 maids a milking," writes Justin Kavanagh. "Finishing off with one of David with Richie Partridge in his pear tree."
37 min: Riise swings in a cross, Liverpool nod clear. Riether jabs a pass out of play. Fulham need half-time like a turkey needs a convincing chicken costume at this time of year.
This is created by a Xavi-esque pass from Stewart Downing. No, really. It's a fantastic reverse ball from the winger that takes five Fulham defenders out of the game and picks out the run of Gerrard, who finishes neatly passed Schwarzer. And it's no less than Liverpool deserve.
35 min: Dan Littler weighs in with my favourite thus far: "We Michu a Merry Christmas."
33 min: Fulham have had 73% of possession. In the last five minutes.
30 min: "John Wark-ing Around the Christmas Tree," warbles Phil Sawyer. Richardson swings in a glorious set piece from deep, but it just evades the onrushing attackers.
29 min: Suso is inches away from being put through, thanks to a Suarez pass that is so clever it does cryptic crosswords in its spare time. Riether just gets across in time to snuff out the danger.
27 min: Reina is called into action for pretty much the first time as Richardson swerves in a low shot. The keeper saves in rather ungainly fashion with his legs.
26 min: "Do they know it's Chris Woods?" writes @rodgersofnorwich, who would be in top spot if the song were not actually called Feed the World.
24 min: ASTONISHING MISS! Fulham are a complete shambles at the back but Liverpool haven't punished them. Suarez collects the ball inside the box, then lays in back to Gerrard who acrobatically volleys at goal. It hits Hangeland and bounces back out to Suarez who squares to Agger, a yard out, but somehow the Dane manages to put his shot into the upper tier. Incredible.
23 min: Berbatov plays a little toe-poked pass into Dejagah that's so cute it has its own range of fluffy toys. The Iranian international can't make anything of it.
22 min: Gerrard finds Suarez, but the Uruguayan drags his low shot well wide from distance.
20 min: Dejagah slips in Kacaniklic down the right channel. Enrique does very well to slide in and block the shot.
19 min: … shanked to the near post by Gerrard.
18 min: Johnson scurries down the right and wins a corner off Riise …
16 min: "Ji Dong-Won Merrily On High," suggests @BenTOGM on Twitter. Suarez bundles over Baird to concede a free-kick.
14 min: Fulham clown about in midfield and almost get Liverpool away on the attack once more. In further bad news for the visitors Riether is really struggling. In even worse news, Phillipe Senderos is warming up …
12 min: Downing cuts inside once more and lets fly at goal. It's drifting a touch wide, but Schwarzer gets a fingertip on it.
11 min: "Baby it's Steve Bould Outside," suggests Alec Austin. For some reason that conjures a rather unsettling image – the former Gunners centre half looming out of the gloaming on a snowy night.
10 min: Liverpool are in complete control here. Fulham really haven't got started.
Easy peasy this for Liverpool. Gerrard whips in the corner. Two Fulham players challenge for the ball, but can only bundle into each other and direct the ball into the path of Skrtel, who strikes his volley sweeter than a badly made batch of mulled wine.
7 min: "Deck the Halls With Boughs of Jol-ly," whistles Lou Roper. How about: Petr Cech the John Halls with Alan Gows of … no, I can't go on. Downing cuts inside and fires in a low cross that deflects away for a corner …
5 min: Enrique shimmies and shakes inside before Karagounis dons his cape and comes to Fulham's rescue. The resultant corner is nodded well over by Daniel Agger, who is completely free near the penalty spot.
4 min: Hughes pumps it long in the vague direction of Berbatov. He's already looking an isolated figure up front
3 min: Downing has started wide on the right, where he'll be up against Liverpool old biy John Arne Riise.
2 min: Gerrard sweeps a long pass out to Jose Enrique, who wins a throw in deep in Fulham territory.
1 min: "Fairy-tale of Dwight Yorke," hums Conor Healy.
Peep! Off we go then. Suarez and Shelvey get things underway.
Click-clack, click-clack … out come the teams into a drizzly Merseyside night. "Pepe the red nose Reina," sings Anne Dew.
… it might be a good time to buy this.
"Let it Evander Sno," trills Col Chadwick.
"When Adrian Chiles is born," suggests our very own Ian McCourt.
"Ben Pringle Bells," warbles Conor Healy.
"All I Want For Christmas Is Jostein Flo," is one of mine. Although it's one that only works if you're John Motson.
Once in Edgar David's City. The Yoann Folly and the Ivy. John Harkes! The Herald Angels Sing. Aron Winter Wonderland. Christmas songs with footballers' names shoe-horned in. Let's go. But anything featuring Roque Santa Cruz is banned.
Liverpool: Reina, Johnson, Skrtel, Agger, Enrique, Lucas, Gerrard, Shelvey, Suso, Downing, Suarez. Subs: Jones, Carragher, Wisdom, Allen, Sterling, Sahin, Henderson.
Fulham: Schwarzer; Riether, Hughes, Hangeland, Riise; Dejagah, Karagounis, Baird, Richardson, Kacaniklic; Berbatov. Subs: Senderos, Kasami, Stockdale, Briggs, Rodallega, Frei, Tavares.
So Jol opts for one up front. The challenge will be to get people up and around Berbatov. Suso starts for Liverpool
There's a real contrast between these clubs. Fulham's goals are clearly defined. Martin Jol, after the Cottagers' defeat to Tottenham earlier this month, spelled out what they needed from the season – to reach 40 points. And he was happy enough because they were very much on course to reach 20 points by the halfway point of the season. A long-term goal, a short-term goal, and the club's aims neatly compartmentalised.
For Brendan Rodgers the goal is nothing like as clear. A return to the Champions League is the obvious, eventual, target, but what would constitute a decent season? Tenth? Sixth? Or does league placing really not matter to the Reds' project this season?