• Since taking over at Spurs, Harry Redknapp has overseen five wins from seven games in all competitions against Liverpool and in only one of those games has his side failed to score at least one
• Jamie Carragher has scored the same number of Premier League goals for Liverpool in his career as he has own goals for Tottenham (three)
• Tottenham have conceded as many goals (14) in their past six home matches as they did in the previous 25 at White Hart Lane
• Liverpool have kept only one clean sheet in their past seven Premier League matches
Your teams are in:
Tottenham: Friedel, Walker, Kaboul, King, Assou-Ekotto, Kranjcar, Parker, Modric, Bale, Adebayor, Defoe. Subs: Cudicini, Pavlyuchenko, Van der Vaart, Giovani, Bassong, Corluka, Livermore.
Liverpool: Reina, Skrtel, Carragher, Agger, Jose Enrique, Henderson, Lucas, Adam, Downing, Suarez, Carroll. Subs: Doni, Maxi, Coates, Kuyt, Spearing, Bellamy, Robinson.
Referee: Mike Jones (Cheshire)
Harry Redknapp is interviewed pre-game and rightly points out that it's not exactly time to be panicking at Spurs. They may be just off the relegation places but have played the Manchesters United and City so far this season. Interesting him to hear him include Stoke as a possible challenger for the fourth Champions League place. Then again they do have Cameron Jerome now.
Alarmingly, there is a strong smell of vomit coming from the subs desk at the moment. It first emerged on Friday afternoon but has gained strength over the weekend. The source of the smell is the biggest office mystery since the man in the cubicle next to me in the men's toilets was crying one Saturday morning. I managed to identify his shoes under the door but never tracked him down.
Andy Carroll is back in the team today, of course. I might feel a tad harsh done by if I was Dirk Kuyt, who he replaces. No place for Gerrard on the bench yet.
1 min: And we're off. Liverpool kick-off and work it back to Pepe Reina. Good positive intent. "Interesting to read about the Guardian office mysteries," lies Paul Jackson. "They don't quite match the Arsenal office mystery, namely how Laurent Koscielny managed to score that own goal yesterday."
3 min: Adebayor flashes a shot wide. Kranjcar runs on to a flick from Adebayor, passes it to the striker but it's dragged wide. "Perhaps by some amazing coincidence the guy crying in the toilet cubicle was Dirk Kuyt," says Ben Bamford.
5 min: Another great chance for Spurs. Defoe is almost on to a cross and Agger has to come in with a crunching challenge to block the shot. "Do they really pay you for this?," asks Sean Kilgannon, coming out fighting. Hang on, I'm supposed to be paid for this? I was paying them.
GOAL!!!!!!! Spurs 1-0 Liverpool (Modric 6) Wow. Well, looks like Spurs did well to hang onto him. Another attack down the right from Spurs – Liverpool have barely left their own half – it snarls up in a crush of bodies on the edge of the area and falls to Modric who curls the ball into the top corner. Magnificent.
10 min: Bad new Chelsea: you'll have to fork out another £10m for Modric in January now.
11 min: Agger looks winded and may not continue ... actually looks like he'll soldier on. "The smell's not an old vase of flowers is it," asks Rory Davies "Took me three weeks to track a similar smell once. The flowers still looked lovely, but the smell was similar to a kipper left to steep in a glass of milk, seasoned with parmesan." The Sport desk's flower budget has been cut in recent weeks (outrage) so it's probably not that.
14 min: Modric is feeling zingy today. He attempts a 40-yard pass with the outside of his boot that nearly releases Bale. Seconds later he forces Reina into a good save, low to his left. Modric is playing as well as Liverpool are badly. "In some countries leaving vomit on a desk is a sign of love for the desk owner," says Ian Copestake. "Or is that flowers?" Well, that would make sense when we take the flower budget into account.
16 min: Modric releases Bale again. Liverpool just manage to clear but this is the most 5-0-looking 1-0 I've ever seen.
19 min: Liverpool put the ball in the net but it's ruled offside. Spurs mess around on the edge of their own area, lose possession and Suarez pokes home but it's disallowed. There was no need for that farce from Spurs. "What is Twitter, Mon. Lutz?," asks J McAferty. It's a way of athletes writing stories so journalists don't need to. The grammar and punctuation is usually better too.
21 min: Liverpool lose possession with a lazy pass again. Adebayor eventually shoots over. Gary Naylor has some thoughts on the goal. "Defoe's poor technique lets the ball bobble away from him and Modric's perfect technique slams the ball into the corner. A perfect illustration of why the influx of properly schooled foreign players has improved British technique not a jot. Those players outside the top clubs will never have the ability and those that are at the top club have best best foreign stars to do most of the difficult stuff for them. Still, in better news, we can write off Liverpool again I see."
23 min: Adam lines up a free-kick he plays it in to Skrtel at the far post, he nods it across goal but he was offside. If it wasn't for techincalities like "rules" Liverpool could be 2-1 up.
26 min: Agger's earlier injury has proven too much. He's replaced by summer signing Coates.
28 min: RED CARD! (Adam) Things just got a lot tougher for Liverpool. He goes in on Parker's shin and picks up his second booking.
30 min: Even better new for Liverpool: Spurs have a free-kick in Bale territory. The Welshman steps up and ...
30 min and a bit: ... slams it into the wall. "Far be it from me to question your veracity, but did you really manage only to identify the shoes but not their tearstained wearer," says Patrick Cullen. "Surely you could give us a few more clues - was there an Irish lilt to the fall of the tears, or a stoic Home Counties lip they came to rest upon? Just idle curiosity about this caring, sharing world..." I inspected everyone's shoes in the office for days but couldn't track the suspect down. But if you're asking if it was Barry Glendenning, then yes, it was.
33 min: Well, Liverpool have managed not to give it away 38 times in the last minute so they've improved massively since the sending off. Oh. They've just given away another stupid free-kick. "Do the English no longer complain about foreigners (in this case the Welsh Gareth Bale) pleading with the referee to get a player sent off," Cian O Suilleabhain. "It seemed to pass without comment on Sky." I know, it was the one thing England were good at, and we don't do it anymore. Someone needs to point out that foreign keepers are no good at crosses.
35 min: Liverpool have a dangerous cross but Spurs clear. Bale sprints clear, is felled by Skrtel and the defender is booked.
37 min: Modric takes the free-kick to the left of the area after that foul but Liverpool deal with it comfortably enough.
39 min: Liverpool show some coherence at last and string together a few passes before the sight of Andy Carroll tempts someone into a long ball, which ... well .. you can guess how it ended.
40 min: Coates picks up the first booking of his Liverpool career, after bringing down Adebayor. Spurs have got a free-kick on the edge of the area.
41 min: Modric takes the free-kick, the Liverpool wall does its job and the ball flops out for a corner.
42 min: Defoe volleys across the ball and a deflection brings another corner. Kaboul heads wide.
44 min: Suarez is in a decent position and is about to shoot but the sight of Andy Carroll tempts someone into a punt toward the far post, which ... well .. you can guess how it ended.
45 min +2: Another brilliant ball from Modric – he has been superb this afternoon – allows Walker to run into the box but his cross is cut out.
45 min +3: Coates doesn't look great going foward so far. The sight of Andy Carroll tempts someone into a long ball, which ... well .. you can guess how it ended.
45 min +4: Suarez 'applauds' Mike Jones after a decision goes against them and is booked. That sums up the half up for the visitors.
Half time emails: My colleague Gregg Roughley is making the most of his honeymoon in Japan by reading the MBM. Let no one say the man doesn't know how to have a good time. "Tom, can you do me a favour and just brazenly lie in the rest of your MBM so that Liverpool battle to a 2-1 win? The only thing threatening to overshadow my Japanese honeymoon are Liverpool. Saw them get beat by Stoke on a dodgy laptop feed while Anna (the lucky wife) slept beside me in bed and now following your MBM on my phone while Anna (the lucky wife) reads beside me in bed (10.05pm in Uno!). I don't ask for much Lutz ..." Liverpool are losing 1-0 and they're shocking.
Nostalgia department with Mac Millings: "Do you still look as handsomely terrifying as you did back in '08? In that pic, I can't tell if you're going to thrill me or kill me. A bit of both, I suspect." Why do you think Gregg Roughley is thinking about me on his honeymoon.
45 min: We're off again. I should correct a mistake at this point, I said Skrtel went off injured earlier. It was Agger. My excuse is my housemate's birthday last night and the fact that the Liverpool defenders all resemble a horrible anti-football mess this afternoon. Van der Vaart is on for Skrte... Kranjcar. Here's Dominic Wright: "In this cosmopolitan age shouldn't refs learn the most common insults of every nation on the pitch? Suarez would have been sent off by a Spanish-speaking referee for his choice epithets after getting the yellow card. You can do the asterisking, but the lovely Luis said, among other things, '[BAD WORDS IN SPANISH].' In another fun episode for fans of lipreading, Kenny, after seeing the Adam foul on the big screen, turned and said 'mumble mumble mumble straight red.'"
46 min: Adebayor is running Modric close for man of the match. He plays Defoe in brilliantly. Defoe's finish is less than brilliant. He was flagged offside, a decision almost as poor as Defoe's shot.
49 min: Liverpool win a free-kick on the half-way line. Walker intercepts and the ball eventually finds its way to Defoe, whose shot is deflected into Reina's arms. "Which Uno is Gregg in," asks Tim Cleminson. "If he's in Okayama, he can come and play futsal with me and some Japanese friends tomorrow evening. Sure the lucky wife would love that. She could even babysit as a kind of 'homestay adventure'. Let me know if he's interested. But got a feeling he's not in the wild west where I have my half arsed kick abouts..."
52 min: Carroll flops to the ground after a tussle with Assout-Ekoto. He did go down very easily given the size difference but that could have been a penalty on another day. Meanwhile, romance is dead. "Also on honeymoon but in Thailand," says Damien Daly. "Following match on phone while. Wife reads next to me. Lie and make it 1-2 to Liverpool on second half." No.
54 min: Suzrez is putting in a fine performance as An Angry Young Man. He kicks the turf in frustration as Parker dares to play a nice pass to a team-mate.
56 min: Free-kick for Spurs to the right of the area. It's straight into Reina's gloves though.
57 min: Spurs continue to dominate entirely but it is still only 1-0. This has a laughable own-goal equaliser written all over it. Spurs have another shot saved.
59 min: It's Defoe who sets up Adebayor this time. Adebayor cuts in from Reina's right but his finish is very odd a weird stab that looks more like a back pass. In fact it is a back pass and Reina gathers the ball gratefully. "This shoddy Liverpool team further reinforce my (totally incorrect) theory that the football media is an occlusive propaganda circus lead by Alan 'Mum-Ra' Hansen and that other fella who wanted News Int to make him rich," says Daniel Montefusco. "Shaky pundits perpetuate the myth that Liverpool are any good and King Kenny is the man. They're not. He isn't."
62 min: Red card!!!!!! (Skrtel) He should really have gone off injured when I told him. A crunch on Bale means Liverpool are now down to nine men. Not a great challenge but the referee has been very keen on handing out cards today.
64 min: In Liverpool's defence they are only 1-0 down. Hang on ... "Regarding where people are following from, I'm in New Orleans while the girlfriend sleeps next to me," says Rowan Hooper. MBM readers really should stop drugging their girlfreinds. "Not that bothered about the lack of Liverpool goals as I saw Big Jay McNeely perform a number called Insect Ball last night. Awesome."
GOAL!!!!!! Spurs 2-0 Liverpool (Defoe 65) Game over? Game over. Defoe turns his marker and sends a low shot into the corner of the net. Gregg Roughley's honeymoon just took a turn for the worse.
GOAL!!!!!! Spurs 3-0 Liverpool (Adebayor 67) Reina, spills a shot, and Adebayor is left with a simple finish. "I know 9 v 11 looks bad for Liverpool, but it should be no different from 10 v 11," says Jayan Eledath. "Bale was playing as though Skrtel wasn't there anyway." In Jayan's defence he wrote this when it was still 1-0.
71 min: Good tactics from Dalglish. To calm things down he's brought on Bellamy (for Downing). Spearing came on for Suarez. "You'll never get sent off alone," chuckles Todd MacGregor.
73 min: Spurs have around 58 passes in a row. Liverpool look very weary. "MBM readers with girlfriends?! What madness is this," asks Ryan Dunne.
75 min: Bale clatters into Reina as the keeper comes for the cross. Free-kick to Liverpool.
77 min: Modric dances into space but is stopped by Enrique as he prepares to shoot.
79 min: Bale has a good chance around 10-yards out but doesn't get the contact he should have. "I suspect these 'sleeping' wives and girfriends are made of latex," says Tom Shaw.
82 min: Liverpool cover up and lean on the ropes as Spurs continue the assualt. "As a Liverpool fan, I must concede four faults of Dalglish and FSG," says Navin Seeterram. 1. Allowing a situation to brew which let Meireles leave - especially when he is worth a central midfield place ahead of Henderson and Adam. 2. Sticking with Carragher at centre back - who has been past it well before the time he somehow had his contract renewed (the day before FSG purchased Liverpool). 3. To play a deep defensive defensive and midfield lines against good Premier League opposition away from home. 4. Mr. Henry said he admired the Arsenal model. I suppose that means buying low selling high devoid of a leadership core that will win trophies."
83 min: Giovani and Bassong on for King and Defoe. "Either Kenny is very tactically naive or just plain stupid playing Skrtel at right back, last week he was cronic against Stoke in the same position and last season he also got a run out there too and was equally useless," says Anthony O' Connell. "Looks like we still have some deadwood to clear out."
85 min: Spurs seem to be very keen on not hurting Liverpool's feelings. They press and press but refuse to shoot. Spearing does for Liverpool though: he shoots from 35-yards out but it goes wide.
87 min: "0-1 to Stoke, three down to Spurs, if this downward trend continues we might start thinking that 'King Kenny' is actually a cantankerous, milky-eyed old man with a penchant for selling talented foreign imports (Meireles) and buying in vastly inferior, twice-the-price British replacements (Henderson) and not, as Liverpool fans would have it, the Second Coming of Christ Our Saviour," says Tom Midlane. It's hard to say how bad Liverpool have been, the early sending off affected the game but they had been filth before then.
88 min: Bale lets fly but the ball flies over the bar.
90 min: Parker threads the ball through what is left of the Liverpool defence. Van der Vaart attempts to chip Reina but it doesn't have enough height and the keeper saves easily. Here's Kevin Smith: "To those suggesting Kenny was naive to play Skrtel at Right-back against Bale...who should he have played? Johnson's injured, and a defensive liability anyways. Kelly is also injured, while Flanagan (apparently just returning to fitness?) is rather young and inexperienced. Perhaps, if he is fit, he'd have been the better choice, but most managers would take the experienced centre-back out of position over the inexperienced full-back."
90 min +2: Spurs win a corner but Liverpool defend it easily enough. Spurs have been happy to conserve their energy for th netx match in the last minutes.
GOAL!!!!!! Spurs 4-0 Liverpool (Adebayor 90+3) One last hurrah from Spurs. Adebayor controls a pass beautifully and thrashes the ball past Reina.
PEEEEEEP!!!!! That's it. It's Liverpool's worst Premier League defeat in eight years or so but going down to nine men skewed things horribly. Of more concern than the scoreline was how disjointed they looked when they had 11 players on the pitch though. Adebayor was excellent for Spurs, and Defoe looked refreshed alongside him.