Pre-match ponderings: Hello! And welcome to a gloriously sunny autumnal Saturday afternoon, packed with the kind of unbelievably exciting fixtures which make the Premier League the best league in the entire world, better in oh so many ways than all the other countries' leagues, such as Swansea v Reading, and West Brom v QPR.

Oh.

As it happens, this afternoon's four top-flight fixtures feature every single member of the current Premier League bottom three, and just 30% of the current Premier League top 10. But we won't let that bother us, and will instead put all our energy into getting excited about third-placed Everton, who are at Wigan, sixth-placed West Brom against Mark Hughes' bottom-of-the-pile Rangers, and table-topping Chelsea. The latter will be proving that the old "most competitive league in the world" canard isn't quite all it's cracked up to be by slamming a bootful of beauties past hapless Norwich (disclaimer: some assumptions were made in the preparation of this sentence), who shipped five at home to previously winless Liverpool last time out. All eyes on John Terry and Ashley Cole, if selected (and their Twitter accounts if not).

But we're not only interested in the top flight, even if we are denied the chance to follow the fortunes of the new leaders of the Championship because Cardiff's visit to hopelessly-out-of-sorts Ipswich is today's televised late kick-off. They could find themselves second by then, if Leicester extend their four-game run of wins at home to Bristol City (and to be more accurate, they could find themselves fifth if they get seriously unlucky). Also interesting: Blackburn hosting fellow Maytime Premier League relegationees Wolves; third-place Brighton taking the division's best away record to Derby; and rock-bottom Peterborough, who lost their first seven league games but have won their last two – away from home and everything – hosting 17th-place Nottingham Forest knowing that a third win on the spin would see them overtake their opponents and (probably) saunter merrily clear of the bottom three.

In League One, unbeaten table-toppers Tranmere – "If we play like we did in the second half at Scunthorpe, I don't think there's anyone in this league who can live with us," says Ronnie Moore – visit a Notts County side still in fourth but smarting after a nasty midweek defeat to second-placed Stevenage. "What you don't do after a defeat is get off the bus," said Keith Curle, and I for one have absolutely no idea what he means.

And in League Two there'll be a bit of a mini-league involving four of the top five, with second-placed Port Vale visiting fourth-placed Exeter, and fifth-placed Cheltenham hosting third-placed Fleetwood. Gillingham, already five points clear, will gleefully watch them all take points off each other while they seek to extend their 100% away record at mid-table Oxford United.

So, that's what I'm excited about today – well, that and my own team's inevitable victory over whichever hapless bunch of unfortunates are unlucky enough to be ordered into their fearsome arena. What have I missed?

2.21pm: This Blackburn-related news is just in from the Press Association:

"Alan Shearer has admitted he is open to the possibility of taking up the vacant manager's role at Blackburn. The former Rovers striker, who had a short spell in management with Newcastle, spent four years at Ewood Park as a player. When asked about his interest in the job, the 42-year-old told BBC's Football Focus: "I've not spoken to the Blackburn owners. If they approached me I would speak to them."

2.28pm: Chelsea's team has been widely tweeted but not yet Press Associationed, so you'll have to make do with Swansea v Reading:
Swansea: Vorm, Rangel, Chico, Williams, Davies, Dyer, Britton, Michu, Ki, Routledge, Graham. Subs: Tremmel, Tate, Hernández, Shechter, Moore, De Guzman, Tiendalli.
Reading: McCarthy, Shorey, Mariappa, Gorkss, Cummings, McAnuff, Karacan, Tabb, Kebe, Pogrebnyak, Hunt. Subs: Stuart Taylor, Pearce, Le Fondre, McCleary, Robson-Kanu, Guthrie, Roberts.
Referee: Mike Dean (Wirral).

2.30pm: And here are some more teams. I'll post all the Premier League line-ups as I get them, but feel free to request others.
Wigan: Al Habsi, Ramis, Caldwell, Figueroa, Boyce, McCarthy, McArthur, Beausejour, Kone, Di Santo, Maloney. Subs: Pollitt, Jones, Watson, Gomez, McManaman, Boselli, Miyaichi.
Everton: Howard, Coleman, Jagielka, Heitinga, Baines, Mirallas, Neville, Osman, Pienaar, Fellaini, Jelavic. Subs: Mucha, Oviedo, Naismith, Distin, Gueye, Anichebe, Duffy.
Referee: Kevin Friend (Leicestershire).

2.35pm: The Chelsea team is in, and John Terry and Ashley Cole both start.
Chelsea: Cech, Ivanovic, Luíz, Terry, Cole, Mikel, Lampard, Mata, Oscar, Hazard, Torres. Subs: Turnbull, Romeu, Ramires, Moses, Cahill, Azpilicueta, Bertrand.
Norwich: Ruddy, Russell Martin, Barnett, Bassong, Garrido, Elliott Bennett, Howson, Hoolahan, Johnson, Tettey, Holt. Subs: Bunn, Turner, Snodgrass, Jackson, Pilkington, Morison, Ryan Bennett.
Referee: Anthony Taylor (Cheshire).

2.39pm: And to complete the Premier League pack, this is how the sides will line up at the Hawthorns:
West Brom: Foster, Tamas, McAuley, Olsson, Popov, Yacob, Mulumbu, Gera, Morrison, Odemwingie, Long. Subs: Luke Daniels, Rosenberg, Dorrans, Jara Reyes, Lukaku, Dawson, Fortuné.
QPR: Julio Cesar, Bosingwa, Ferdinand, Nelsen, Hill, Granero, Mbia, Wright-Phillips, Taarabt, Park, Zamora. Subs: Green, Traoré, Cissé, Mackie, Onuoha, Hoilett, Faurlin.
Referee: Mike Jones (Cheshire).

2.40pm: Manchester City have comprehensively beaten Sunderland 3-0 at the Etihad. Nothing now to distract us from those 3pm kick-offs.

2.53pm: Sky's Soccer Saturday panel are discussing unpopular managers. I'm mildly surprised to hear that the one manager who Matt Le Tissier played under but didn't like, was Glenn Hoddle.

2.56pm: Players are strolling onto pitches across the nation. We're moments from matchtime.

3.00pm: Let's play football!

3.03pm: Fernando Torres just broke the Norwich offside trap, with three minutes played, but delayed his shot, was forced wide, then had to check back and give the ball away. He should just have smacked it into the back of the net.

3.06pm: GOAL! West Brom 1 QPR 0! Lovely cross from Shane Long on the right wing, who pegged it past his full-back as if on a jet pack, and then curled the ball onto the head of James Morrison, who headed back across goal and in. Simple, and excellent.

3.07pm: "Ashley Cole, he tweets what he wants," sing the Chelsea fans.

3.11pm: GOALS! First, Chelsea 0 Norwich 1! A superbly controlled low volley from Holt from 15 yards out, from some other fella's knock-down.

3.12pm: Another goal! Wigan 1 Everton 0! This time it's a cross from the left which Arouna Koné nods in from two yards out. Was he offside? It certainly looked that way!

3.14pm: And another goal! Wigan 1 Everton 1! Another header from no distance out! Everton bring the ball towards the edge of Wigan's area but the player who attempts a curler to the far post falls over while he's doing it, and the ball is miscued onto the head of Jelavic, two yards beyond the far post, who nodded in.

3.16pm: And yet another goal! Chelsea 1 Norwich 1! And that's the goal of the day so far. Mata gets the ball on the right wing, towards the byline. He backheels to Ivanovic, whose excellent first-time cross is headed into the far corner by Fernando Torres.

3.23pm: GOAL! Chelsea 2 Norwich 1! Torres attempts to overhead kick a bouncing ball in the Norwich penalty area, and indeed succeeds in completing the overhead kick. But instead of flying into the back of the net the ball scoots away from goal, straight to the onrushing Frank Lampard, who lashes it in from 18 yards.

3.25pm: GOAL! West Brom 2 (Zoltan Gera 22) QPR 0! Must admit I totally missed that one, but Matt Le Tissier tells me it was a nasty miskicked clearance from Anton Ferdinand that Gera simply slotted in.

3.26pm: Another goal! Wigan 2 Everton 1! This time Koné is the provider, running down the right wing, cutting into the penalty area and then rolling the ball, alarmingly slowly, just about into the path of Franco Di Santo, who slams it into the roof of the net from 12 yards.

3.30pm: Bradley Johnson just injured two Chelsea players in the space of about a second, bashing into Mikel and then slashing away at Luíz, as if engaged in some kind of human skittles. Both the boys in blue roll around for a while, looking quite put out, before getting on with the game. No booking for Johnson, which seems like a stroke of luck for the lad.

3.32pm: GOAL! Chelsea 3 Norwich 1! Mata carries the ball 40 yards and then slices the Norwich defence entirely and convincingly apart with a delicious killer pass, and Eden Hazard passes it into the corner of the net. That was very nice. They could score 50 here.

3.34pm: GOAL! Swansea 0 Reading 1! Swansea pass the ball around their defence, as they do. Pok, pok, pok, pok, pok. It ends up with Vorm, and Reading closing him down, so he puts his foot through it. Big mistake. Ten seconds later, and without touching the ball again, the home side are behind, Pogrebnyak eventually poking it under the keeper and into the net.

3.35pm: GOAL! West Brom 2 QPR 1! That's a super goal! Granero hits the ball over the West Brom defence – or three of them, the left back being 10 yards further back – and Taarabt chests it down and volleys it emphatically into the net. Nicely done.

3.37pm: Crikey! So many Premier League goals, it really is the best league in the world.

3.40pm: Another chance for Chelsea. Oscar collects the ball a couple of yards outside the penalty area, and with a small army of Norwich defenders blocking his path. He casually skips his way through them, but his side-footed finish is equally casual and Ruddy saves.

3.44pm: Another chance at Stamford Bridge, but this one falls to Norwich. Not much to it, really – a looping cross from the left wing, Grant Holt unmarked in the middle, and his header bounces a yard wide.

3.46pm: And a chance at the Hawthorns, where Morrison (I think) is played clean through, but Julio Cesar saves!

3.47pm: GOAL! Swansea 0 Reading 2! A Reading player has a shot blocked, but the ball falls to another Reading player, whose shot is also blocked, but the ball falls to a third Reading player, whose shot is also blocked, and this time the ball loops to Noel Hunt who volleys home from eight yards.

3.53pm: Fun and games at Vicarage Road, where Matej Vydra was sent off just before half-time – but nobody knows why. Chris Kamara on Soccer Saturday had no idea, and Watford's official Twitter feed is reporting that the "crowd, journos and players [are] equally confused". They're 1-1 with Middlesbrough at the break.

3.57pm: "Greetings from Cairo," writes Simon Frank. "With Chelsea handing out a pounding today, are we to expect a 'Ruddy Hell' headline tomorrow?" Quite possibly, Simon – but it wouldn't be the first time we'd have seen it, I'm afraid.

4.01pm: Let's play football!

4.04pm: At Stamford Bridge, the first chance of the second half falls to Norwich, with Grant Holt again beating Terry in the air, but heading wide.

4.07pm: "Simon, why on earth are the Norwich crowd booing Cole?" asks Barry Praag. "Are they FA stooges!" There are any number of things that convince fans to boo an opposing player, some of them bizarrely trivial, but being Ashley Cole has got to be among the most compelling (for all that he's been a brilliant full-back).

4.09pm: Chelsea should have had a penalty there, as Barnett fairly cynically sticks out a leg to bring down Juan Mata, but the referee's not impressed.

4.11pm: More on the ghost red card at Vicarage Road. "Saw footage at HT with Chris Kamara, here at #watfordfc for Sky Sports," writes whoever writes Watford's official Twitter feed. "Kamara in absolutely no doubt that there was nothing in it at all."

4.13pm: Swansea hit the post! That was a not-very-good header that Alex McCarthy darn nearly flapped into the back of the net. In the end he merely flapped it onto the post, which was a stroke of luck. Having said that, I've just seen someone else on Twitter say the header was "brilliantly turned onto the post", so I could be being a tad harsh.

4.19pm: I may be making a bit of a big deal of this red card at Vicarage Road, which Kamara has now said on Sky Sports was "completely wrong", but a glance at the referee's stats for the season are illuminating – it's his eighth red card in 10 league games. Last season he produced six in 34 – what happened to him this summer?

4.30pm: Ryan Dunne points out that Norwich fans might have been convinced to boo Ashley Cole not just by yesterday's Anti-FA Twitter outburst, but by the section of Cheryl Cole's forthcoming autobiography serialised in today's Sun. This details his extramarital indiscretions – "Over the next few days I heard two more girls had come forward to say they'd had sex with Ashley. I didn't read the stories, but I knew one was saying it happened when Ashley and I were courting, and another said she slept with him a few months after our wedding." – and includes her yelling at her footballing then-husband: "I hope she was worth it. It's the end of your marriage. It's f***ed!"

Incidentally, courting? Courting? Are you living in the 1950s, Cheryl?

4.31pm: GOAL! Swansea 1 Reading 2! Routledge's cross from just outside the right corner of the penalty area clips a defender's arse and skews to the far post, where Machu Pichu scores with a diving header. About time we had a Premier League goal, I must say.

4.34pm: GOAL! Chelsea 4 Norwich 1! Hazard's cross, Mata's hugely unconvincing attempt to control, Ivanovic's emphatic volley. Ruddy got both hands to it, but couldn't keep it out.

4.36pm: GOAL! Swansea 2 Reading 2! Reading give the ball away, Routledge plays a one-two, bursts into the penalty area, and scores at the near post with the outside of his right foot to complete Swansea's comeback.

4.39pm: Talking of comebacks, Crystal Palace were 2-0 down at home to Burnley after 40 minutes. They just made it 4-2. Nice.

4.41pm: Bakary Sako has put Wolves 1-0 up against Blackburn at Ewood Park. Quite a tasty strike, by all accounts.

4.43pm: GOAL! West Brom 3 QPR 1! Mulumbu passes the ball to Morrison on the edge of the area and then continues his run. Morrison plays a one-two with, um, someone else, gets into the box, and pulls the ball back for Mulumbu to score.

4.45pm: GOAL! Wigan 2 Everton 2! Everton's fifth penalty appeal is the first that the referee's agreed with. Leighton Baines, against his former club, makes no mistake from the spot, sending the ball flying into the top right corner of the goal (as he was looking at it).

4.49pm: Peeeeep! The final whistle has gone at Stamford Bridge, where Chelsea have beaten Norwich 4-1. And Reading have hit the bar at Swansea.

4.51pm: GOAL! West Brom 3 QPR 2! Another lovely goal, a decent spell of pressure ending with Esteban Granero receiving the ball from Park Ji-Sung, beating a couple of men with his turn and then chipping the ball into the near top corner of the net from just outside the penalty area.

4.54pm: Peeeep! West Brom have beaten QPR, though only just – the visitors' last chance coming from Granero's corner, which ended in a decent shooting chance being sent over the bar with the last kick of the game. Final score: 3-2.

4.56pm: Peeeep peeeep! All the Premier League matches are now over, with Swansea and Reading and Wigan and Everton all drawing 2-2.

5.00pm: In the Championship, Leicester go top, at least briefly, after beating Bristol City 2-0. Elsewhere Wolves won 1-0 at Blackburn, and Crystal Palace came back from 2-0 down to beat Burnley 4-3. In League One, leaders Tranmere have won 1-0 at Notts County, but League Two leaders Gillingham could only draw 0-0 at Oxford. At the other end, Barnet twice took the lead at Southend but still couldn't hold on, and drew 2-2. Meanwhile in the Scottish Third Division, Stirling Albion have beaten Rangers 1-0.

5.03pm: Meanwhile, the teams are in for the late kick-off at Arsenal. Follow the match live with Scott Murray here:
West Ham: Jaaskelainen, Demel, Collins, Reid, McCartney, Noble, Diamé, Vaz Te, Nolan, Jarvis, Carroll. Subs: Henderson, Tomkins, Cole, Maiga, Taylor, Benayoun, O'Neil.
Arsenal: Mannone, Jenkinson, Mertesacker, Vermaelen, Gibbs, Ramsey, Cazorla, Arteta, Gervinho, Giroud, Podolski. Subs: Martínez, Koscielny, André Santos, Walcott, Oxlade-Chamberlain,
Coquelin, Arshavin.
Referee: Phil Dowd (Staffordshire).

5.08pm: And with that, I'm off. Thanks for your company. Don't forget to check out the West Ham v Arsenal minute-by-minute, and I'll see you soon!