Team of the week
Sepp Blatter's lawyers: winning an injunction in Zurich to ban a cartoon book about his life at Fifa. Olé Andersen's satirical book – starring a Sepp doppelgänger in a "Fair Play" T-shirt – has "no aesthetic value" and threatens their client's "good reputation … If published, he could never repair the damage."
Quote of the week
Last week's best defence of Qatar 2022: "Any other nation that has hosted a major tournament has faced the same kind of criticism, the same kind of doubts and scepticism, including London 2012" – Qatar's tournament head Hassan al-Thawadi, recalling the London 2012 slave scandal.
Among the happy consequences of Fifa giving Qatar the World Cup: the formation of a new Qatari/Swiss sports marketing firm to "enhance the commercial value" of such events in the region. President of the new firm's parent company, Sepp's nephew Philippe Blatter, says: "We will meet this emerging demand."
Still more than a club
New last week for Barcelona president Sandro Rosell: unveiling a new €15m shirt deal with Intel; and denying club member Jordi Cases's claim that he "misappropriated" €40m from their deal to sign Neymar. "It's a reckless allegation. I'm relaxed."
Defence of the week
Steve Bruce, backing owner Assem Allam's right to rebrand Hull. "The chairman has put something like £70m into this club. For me, he should be held in higher esteem." 5%: Interest charged on Allam's £72m loans – with £2.8m payable to Allamhouse Ltd in 2012-13.
• Bruce's developing view on the rebrand itself: 4 Oct: "It's his prerogative. As long as we're not going to be playing in pink next week." 2 Dec: "If he wants us to play in pink fairy dresses he's entitled." 13 Dec: "If he asked us to play in frilly dresses, we would."
2007: Cristiano Ronaldo reveals in his book: "Humility is one of the values I most cherish. On the day I have a child , these are the principles I will pass on." 2013: Launches a Ronaldo museum in Madeira, a line of official Ronaldo underpants and a new official Ronaldo social network, Viva Ronaldo – "where my true fans belong".
Marching on together
Manager news: Brazil, 9 Dec: Criciúma coach Argel Fucks dedicates his side's escape from relegation to "a great man": president Antenor Angeloni. "We're so tight, so together. The president gave me this mission, and it's mission accomplished. Now we look forward to next season." 10 Dec: Angeloni sacks him.
• Angeloni's message to curious fans: "I'm in charge, I'm the dictator here. The fans must stay cool and quiet and understand this fact: I know what I'm doing."
Force of the week
Romania: Constanta owner Gheorghe Hagi, offering a community-service job to Gigi Becali when the Steaua owner moves to a nearby open prison. "He's wholeheartedly welcome. Apart from a big mouth, Gigi's a true force for good."
Turnout of the week
Yeovil: blaming negative publicity after only 16 women turned up to audition for the club's new girl band. Organisers denied the project was an "embarrassment". Judge and club manager Gary Johnson: "They all look the part and are very capable."
Spreading good cheer
Romania: Ex-West Brom defender Gabriel Tamas: "In Romania players play like they have a carrot up the arse. We should relax more like in England. I remember once at West Brom we lost 6-0 to Chelsea. Afterwards I was upset, dead inside, like I was at a funeral – but on the bus the boys were happy, laughing, joking, making a huge noise. We can learn from this mentality."
Plan of the week
Romania: Dinamo striker Kévin Zougoula – looking to counter icy conditions by putting his feet and boots in to containers of hot water pre-match. Local press: "By the time he was introduced as an 80th minute sub, he had feet of ice."
Paraguay: Andrea Aranda on contesting the Miss Botinera 2013 title, an award honouring "the queen of football groupies". "It's a title that suits: I'm a magnet for footballers. I had a wonderful relationship with one, and now I eye another."
Plus love latest
Argentina: Model Wanda Nara, moving on from last month's denial that she left Maxi López due to an affair with his former team-mate Mauro Icardi, by having an Icardi tattoo and posing for a photoshoot on a yacht. "Mauro amazes me. This is a man like no other."