Well, that was the rolling blog o'news. Tomorrow: all the latest as Roy Keane incredibly resigns as Republic of Ireland manager after John Delaney nicks his shoes in a drunken prank gone wrong. Bye.
Keane ends on a joke. A laugh. A giggle. "We've had a lovely few days. The hotel's been lovely. The food's been lovely. There have been no potholes on the training ground, we've had footballs." Laughter from the room. They love him!
Back we go! "I'm hoping they're a smart team and they're ready and focused to do the business. I never questioned any of the players' hunger. In some of the big matches, you need quality to win matches. There's loads of areas we can improve on."
Did he go into management too soon? His eyes narrow. "No, I wouldn't agree with that at all. To work at a top club like Sunderland was fantastic. My experience at Ipswich will stand me in good stead."
Keane talks a lot of sense really. I still don't think Nani should have been sent off against Real Madrid, though.
A brief break while the Sky Sports News Television Channel goes to a break. Hopefully when they return Keane will have Saipaned someone.
Has it been frustrating for him out of work? "It's always frustrating. At Ipswich it could have gone better. But there were pluses with the young players and reaching a cup semi-final.
He says he has had opportunities: "One was working abroad, another was an international job, it didn't quite happen. Certainly there are clubs in England I felt should have given me an opportunity."
More on his role: "As an assistant manager you're always working. Martin will pick the team and tactics and hopefully take my opinion.
"My style of management, when I had some good staff round me, was to let my coaches get on with the job. As a manager, you need to step back and see the bigger picture, which doesn't let you go on the training ground as much as you'd like. So that was a big attraction. You're always learning about the game. If you think you have all the answers, you're heading for trouble. I've never, even in my little good spell at Sunderland, thought I had all the answers."
Is previous criticism of players a problem? "There's an issue with certain players in general who think they're better than what they are. It's thrown out too quickly that some players are world class. I felt during the Euros that Ireland should have been better. Players should always do better."
I missed what the question was but Keane has just admonished the person responsible for its ridiculousness.
Opportunity to work with O'Neill an attraction? "Absolutely. 100%. It was a big attraction. You've got to have the right chemistry. If you'd asked me six months ago, would Martin be the type of manager I'd like to work under - absolutely. It doesn't mean it's going to work out. But we're not a pals act. He's a very serious manager."
Would there not be many managers he'd work with? "Possibly so."
He says people might say he's a possible trouble-maker but hopes that O'Neill has seen something else in him, someone who can develop into a good coach.
Is this squad good enough? "Any team needs luck." But, yes, they probably weren't good enough, even if they were in tough groups. "If you don't do the business, you're going to come unstuck."
He continues: "You can't sit back. You've got to watch matches. Watch loads of matches. Watch lads in different environments."
He's been out of the game for a while? "I've had TV commitments, which have been good for me. I've been able to watch matches. Most weekends I'm watching a match."
More from Keane: "It's going to be hard going. It's not going to be a case of clicking the fingers and everything will fall into place."
The talks only lasted two days, Keane says. "I had no reservations."
Keane keeps saying he's not worried about what has gone on in the past. "It's about coming over to help Martin. If we don't get results, we know what's coming."
He says he's got huge respect for O'Neill - but "we're certainly not buddies."
I don't think Keane does buddies.
Is the issue with John Delaney sorted out? He says he "wouldn't be sitting here" if it wasn't.
Will fans forgive him for Saipan? "I can't really worry too much about that. It's about the future. It's about today." WELL WHICH IS IT, ROY? "Hopefully people get behind the team and we'll have good times ahead. I spent years trying to please everybody and trust me it's a waste of time and energy."
"I've only been a boss for two minutes. It's not as if I've been a manager for 20-odd managers. I'm the assistant to Martin. I'm not on a big ego trip. I don't feel I have to be the boss, that's not in my make-up. I hope I get it right in terms of what buttons to press. It's not a massive change for me not being a manager. I've generally been answering to people throughout my career. I've no problem with that, especially when I'm working with people who show me respect."
"A lot of the criticism I've had in the past 15 years is for being very demanding and not settling for second best. I'm not going to apologise for that. Hopefully the young players enjoy working with me."
What is his role? "If you can't get to training on time, there's something drastic." An evil smile. He says people should get to work on time. I'm scared.
He's asked about John Delaney. He shrugs. "One of my strong points is when I've made up with people, I move on. The past is the past. It was very straightforward."
Did he ever envisage this?
"AI always had an open mind. It's an opportunity to work with a top manager. He asked me to get involved. The opportunity was too good to work down. I look forward to working with Martin."
Roy Keane is in the building. He's smiling!
He's not smiling.
That video opens with Keane saying that people seem to forget what happened when he was at the 2002 World Cup. Just putting this out there, but I don't think they do.
So, Roy. What do you think of your new boss, John Delaney?
I didn't have much time for a preamble. Hello!
Preamble? You can stick your preamble up your bollocks. There's your preamble.