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The 11 Fan Commandments
Araz (Queens Park Rangers) 4 years ago
There's a lot of room for debate here, but I do believe there are some concrete rules to being a supporter of a club.
1. Once you've selected your team and pulled on a shirt for the first time you can not under any circumstance or for any reason alter, reselect, un-support or otherwise change or abandon your team in any way shape or form. Stopping support of your selected team is an act of cowardice, choosing a different team makes you a traitor, the club you think you support does not need people like you, off with your head!

2. Your first port of call when choosing a side to support should always be your local team, in the absence of a local team you are permitted to select an alternative team that you have an otherwise strong affiliation with through family, broader geographical, reach or other personal connection. In the absence of both of these you may select any team, however you can not select your team simply because they're the best. There is no room for glory hunters in circles of real supporters, and you must find some other form of connection with a team. Being a real supporter is about suffering with your men, and choosing those who are least likely to suffer invalidates your selection and application as a real supporter. Choosing the best team and then pretending or otherwise fabricating an association with them to satisfy your peers is the lowest act of all and will eat away at you inside.

3. You cannot support more than one club and one national team. Many true football supporters have soft spots for more than one team, especially if the team they supported is a local side with no hope of ever reaching a serious level of competition with in the supporters life time, in this case the man supports his local team but has a passionate stake in a top flight team, this is allowed, but by no means can you "support" more than one club. If you think this is possible you do not understand the nature of rivalry with in football.

4. You can be a real supporter even if you have never been to the stadium of your team, but only if circumstance makes this close to impossible. If for example there are 9 teams in the City you live in but you chose one 200 miles away because you like the colour of their kit, or because they were winning everything yesterday you're not a real supporter and real supporters will never consider you as one of them. You'll always be on the outside looking in and you'll never have that complete and emotional connection with your boys, that simply can not be achieved with TV.

5. Unless you have found yourself saying words close the to following inside your head or out loud in a room or other building surrounded by other men whilst the final moments of a big game are ticking away on at least one occasion you have not matured to the higher echelons of true supporter-ism, you are not discredited but you may not be a real supporter yet

"Dear lord, I know we don't speak often, and I rarely pay you a visit, I'm sorry for that, I really really am, and as selfish it is for me to ask this of you out of the blue, I have no choice and I put my faith in you. You may take an arm, a leg, any limb or even a distant relative if you would just be so kind as give a goal before the whistle goes. I promise I'll be a better man, I'll donate to charity and I'll worship you and spread your good word across the world, if only you could just send us a goal".

6. You automatically, say a prayer, make a bow, chant a cheer or whatever behaviour you would normally reserve only for when you are in the presence of the divine every time your car drives past the stadium of your team, or your train stops at the stop closest to the stadium. You must also have lost your voice through excessive shouting at things you have no control over.

7. If you have never been hugged and mauled almost to death in a dance of savage ecstasy by a complete stranger with whom you'd previously shared no contact other than echoed groans or swear words then you are unlikely to have become a fully qualified supporter just yet.

8. You must have at least on one occasion spent excessively, behaved erratically, been arrested, broken the law, risked missing an important event like the birth of a child or travelled through life threatening conditions in order to make watching the game possible.

9. You must have on at least one occasion completely lost control resulting in profuse swearing, or acts of illogical violence against inanimate objects, in front of children or otherwise inappropriate relatives or people in front of whom you would otherwise maintain complete decorum.

10. Partaken in completely irrational and ridiculous, supersitious behaviour which you would otherwise have considered outdated at least 3 or 400 years ago. This includes but is not limited to, wearing of any lucky item of clothing including shirts and undergarments, doing things in a specific order, saying certain things, sitting in special chairs, touching specific items or any other such stupidity.

11. Erupted in such an uncontrolled and undignified act of joy that the movements of your limbs, and body through time and space become distorted in such a way that when control is regained you have either suffered complete memory loss or can not account for the current position of your body, geographic location or time.

This blog does not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of footytube or its partners.
Vmaestro (Real Madrid) 4 years ago
I am quite sure you started following QPR because you seen something that you like about them, or maybe you are from that area and that determined your choice.
Most chose to follow a football club when they played good, not when they play bad....
No one in their right mind would start following a club when they play crap, unless that person started following a team just because there's a friend or a relative playing for the club.
Your talking about glory hunters, well just to let you know.... All football fans are glory hunters, because all football fans want their club or country to win, not one single person out there would support their club to go for the loss.
People can follow how many clubs they like, it's their choice and they can also quit following that team, simply cos the passion for that team can wear off....
Everyone follows their club differently because we all are different, there's no such thing as in a particular way.
All the criteria you have there, is your personal criteria, so it's not logic or fair to impose you personal criteria of how to be a football fan on someone else.
I personally would have kept it for myself.... Unless I would have been asked.
Jetlifari (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Number 7 always happens to me but only when I'm on a train in a drunken state on a Friday night :/
Eric (Manchester United) 4 years ago
Well said. I've both a football and a soccer team wherein I hit most every one of these points. United and New Orleans Saints all day
Volpe111 (Leicester City) 4 years ago
Falcons fan here.... All I can say is.... Bounty...
HerrFabian (Manchester City) 4 years ago
What a crock! I can most definitely support more than 2 national teams. Citizens of multiple countries have this luxury
Araz (Queens Park Rangers) 4 years ago
I am a citizen of multiple countries myself, so internationals are not so bound by these suggestions, but let me ask you this, if you're two countries played each other at a world cup who would you support (your answer is probably there)? I would pick the underdog
DEFENDtheBRIDGE (Chelsea) 4 years ago
How about the cardinal sin of using "We"? (ex. "We lost the game because of the ref")

It's one of my biggest pet peeves in all of sports.... I'm all for passion and loyalty towards your club, but YOU didn't lose anything! YOU were not on the pitch (legally at least!) the TEAM lost, YOU were merely a spectator along for the ride! So stop saying WE!
Hill (Arsenal) 4 years ago
I disagree. The fans are as much a part of the club as the players. Biggest difference is that the club pays the players to be there while the fans pay to the club to be there. As I fan I honestly have as big of a rollercoaster ride of the ups and downs as the members of the squad do
Franky4fingers (Barcelona) 4 years ago
I agree! For professional team supporters there isn't really a WE. I understand the passion, the agony, the disappointments, the overwhelming joy you feel while you associate yourself with your favorite team but no matter how much money you pay to support the club buying merchandise, season tickets which eventually support the club, you're still an outsider. I use WE only when I support my alma mater because the players, the coach and I share a common thing - our relationship to our college!
Georgio (Bayern München) 4 years ago
I always use we.... I'm infused with FC Bayern, I say it subconciously, until a friend brought it to my attention.... And I was like.... Really? I've been sayin that the whole time? .... Damn.... Eh watever
Hill (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Franky4Fingers, I again disagree. I share a relationship with the players with my love for the club. How is it any different of a relationship of the college I go to? For the fans who are able to go to the stadium and buy season tickets, travel expenses, etc, I would argue that overtime the costs of supporting a team far outweigh the cost of attending a university for 4-6 years. How is attending the university any different than attending a match. I probably spend far more time and focus studying the Arsenal than I do studying school materials haha. I think its perfectly acceptable that fans use 'we' to describe their relationship for their team. I also think it is incredibly arrogant when former professional athletes say that fans have no business using 'we. ' There would be no team without the fans. There would be no professional sports without the fans. There would be no self centered bastard of a player without the fans!
DEFENDtheBRIDGE (Chelsea) 4 years ago
@Hill, you make a compelling argument but at the end of the day the game will go on whether there are butts in the seats or not (take a look around Serie A recently). And YOU had no direct influence on the result of the game so how can you say WE won? It doesn't make you any less of a fan if don't say it, but it makes me cringe every time I see people talk like they were on the field
Hill (Arsenal) 4 years ago
I argue that fans do have a direct influence on the result of the game. Why would home field, home court, home advantage matter so much, if not because of the fans? I definitely understand what you mean, but I think fans have just as much a right to say 'we' as the players themselves.

Do the employees of a club not say we? The manager and assistant managers say we? Where in the club does an employee stop having a right to say 'we? ' If they all have a right to say 'we' then does the person who is assistant secretary to the secretary of the body man of the CEO have a right to say 'we' even though he clearly does not directly effect the result on the pitch?
Coooookie 4 years ago
Semantics.... Call it whatever you like. Fans share in the ups and downs, but no the did not directly influence the outcome of the match (although if your in the stadium you may feel like it). Doesn't matter there is bond between players and fans.... Even if alot of its is just money, there is something magical about it
Achiox (Manchester United) 4 years ago
Number 9? Really?

I don't know what's more sad.... Grown men crying on the field over nothing too serious, or grown men crying OFF the field over nothing too serious.

Football is entertainment, it does not need to be worshiped. Nonetheless, an excellent article; a very fun(ny) read!
AntiFutbol (Club Tijuana) 4 years ago
We all have things that mean to us. It maybe entertainment to you but to some of these fans and especially to these players and staff, it is a way of life. It gives meaning to their life. Same thing when someone gets laid off from the job they love or they lose a loved one. It is a tragedy and its worth losing a tear or two. The point is that we have things that move us to the core and shape the outcome of our lives. Futbol is just that for those who deem it worthy to cry about
Madridista174 (Real Madrid) 4 years ago
A wise man once said, "Football is not a matter of life or death.... I assure you, it is much much more serious than that. "
ScouserDan (Liverpool) 4 years ago
That wise man would be Bill Shankly
Araz (Queens Park Rangers) 4 years ago
And he was a wise man. A man who really understood football and what it means to real supporters
SrpskiCevap (Inter Milan) 4 years ago
Number 3, no. Definitely no. I love both Real Madrid and Inter Milan equally, and it would be the toughest decision choosing one over the other. I've been a true fan of both since I was a young boy
49ers04 (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Sorry bud, that's impossible
Matt (Footytube Staff) 4 years ago
What would you do/ How would you feel if they played each other. If the answer is 'do not care' I would put forward the suggestion you are not a true supporter of either team. On saying that I am open to persuasion so if you can tell me how/why you feel you are a fan of these two teams (or you can just tell me to bog off)
CFLNHLFIFAFAN (Chelsea) 4 years ago
Well you made a decision for Inter over Real on your fan thing beside your name, but I would only go for one unless there is a really big reason
SrpskiCevap (Inter Milan) 4 years ago
I can't describe it, I've always been a fan of Inter and Madrid. Don't ask me why, but I just have.

I remember as a kid trying to get my dad to buy me a Toldo kit, but all we found was a Vieri one. From that point on my love for Inter grew. Then I was introduced to Real Madrid, around the same time. I loved watching them play, and bear in mind this was before I was even 7 years of age.

As for Matt's question: I would honestly feel soooooo weird watching that one. If one team scored I'd be happy, yes, but then I'd also be sad. I'd be hoping for a draw if that's really what you're trying to get out of all this. Thankfully they haven't played each other in how long? I don't really have to worry about that anyways
Araz (Queens Park Rangers) 4 years ago
Don't get me wrong, you can like as many teams as you want, I support QPR because my dad's old house look to voer look a corner of the pitch, but I love watching Barca, all English teams in Europe and anyone who plays the beautiful game beautifully. But I do believe you can only commit your full, undying alliance to only one team, the one you would choose against all others.

Having multiple teams is like minimising your chances of losing out, saving yourself from the agony that comes with being a supporter in a sport where the can only be one winner and many losers
Achiox (Manchester United) 4 years ago
What would you do/ How would you feel if they played each other.

Like having two relatives fight? Especially your own children, your parents, etc. I agree with SrpskiCevap
CFLNHLFIFAFAN (Chelsea) 4 years ago
I can relate to NHL teams, I did post a whole message on here but I have 2 nhl teams for hockey, I cheered for Leafs whole life like last 10 years and then my city gets team and I go to games and stuff and its amazing, too much to explain, but you get it, I support both, have both merchandise but Jets home and can go and watch every game, but when Leafs came(the childhood team) I wore my leafs jersey instead of Jets to that game to support first game but my Jets hat still, I support both and was interesting feeling and hard to make, but I am a fan of both now and it is complicated, as for football(soccer) I always will only cheer for Chelsea and will travel there one day and go to games!
CFLNHLFIFAFAN (Chelsea) 4 years ago
I can relate to NHL teams, I did post a whole message on here but I have 2 nhl teams for hockey, I cheered for Leafs whole life like last 10 years and then my city gets team and I go to games and stuff and its amazing, too much to explain, but you get it, I support both, have both merchandise but Jets home and can go and watch every game, but when Leafs came(the childhood team) I wore my leafs jersey instead of Jets to that game to support first game but my Jets hat still, I support both and was interesting feeling and hard to make, but I am a fan of both now and it is complicated, as for football(soccer) I always will only cheer for Chelsea and will travel there one day and go to games!
SrpskiCevap (Inter Milan) 4 years ago
Exactly, it's hard to explain
LumpOfCelery (Chelsea) 4 years ago
I am surprised no one has gotten pissed at number 4?
Hill (Arsenal) 4 years ago
I tend to agree with it. Although as an American, and the fact that I am in university, I have zero money to go to the Emirates to watch a match
49ers04 (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Considereing my local team (TFC) didn't exist when I got into footy that wasn't up to me. But I did save up for 2 years to the Emirates last season. I wouldn't ever say that makes me a better fan than the above commenter, but I think it's an important right of passage for any fan to do
49ers04 (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Actually "important right of passage" is the wrong phrase since plenty of people just don't have the chance.
But it is something worth doing just for the experience
Hill (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Yup. My home state didn't have a local team when I was growing up either. I believe it was founded couple years ago. They're not even MLS and have no chance of going to the MLS
Hill (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Edit: triple post
Hill (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Edit: triple post. Yeah, I'm talented
Johny (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Sometimes I Like to pretend I'm a Delicious Potato
Matt (Footytube Staff) 4 years ago
I got a magic potato already
Cramonda (Real Cartagena) 4 years ago
Its really funny that everyones team here is a really good team and unlikley their home team lmaoo. But I don't care either way I chose to support my home club (even if its a falure, and know one knows what the f**k it is lol)but I can totaly understand people who like bigger teams, every day I wish I was a fan of a good team. Lol my team is probably going down this season, in an already mediocre league. But its my team
Fxate (Manchester United) 4 years ago
I disagree with 10/11 of these, quite amusing to be honest.

5, and 10 are probably the most rediculous though. Being a fan does not necessitate having or taking part in superstitious nonsense.

1. There are many appropriate situations for disowning your team; proven match fixing for example is a pretty good one.
2. See 4
3. Of course you can support more than one team. There are many people who do so for both national and club level sides. What is wrong with supporting a second or even third team really? If they are in direct competition you may act neutral (to an extent) or you might favour one team slightly more than the other, you can still support both. Many people have second teams, maybe they are in a different league, maybe they are a country you admire other than your own, maybe they are a club that other family members have a connection to.

4. Although I might somewhat agree with the 'if number of teams >= 9 then you cannot support from somewhere else' ANY reason for supporting a club is a completely valid reason, although the 'oh they are winning now' isn't very admirable at all. So because you live near a place that employs players that more likely than not come from places much further away than you are from the stadium you cannot support them? Rediculous reasoning. I have just as much legitimacy of deciding to support Manchester United when I was a child because my favourite colour is red as you have of supporting QPR because your mother just happened to give birth to you in London.

5. I'll skip this one since it will only get me banned for spitting on religious crap.

6. This is one of the only two that are even close to not being stupid. 1/2 accepted

7. Because some people do not like to be touched by complete randoms, you cannot be a proper supporter? Ok.

8. Ambiguous & silly
9. Somewhat true 1/2 accepted

10. Again, i'll skip this because of the 'don't make fun of my belief system' thing

11. While the concept of sudden and uncontrolled joy is acceptable, I guess I'll be harsh and give this a zero too for the 'you have to act like a moron' part.

My 2 pence
49ers04 (Arsenal) 4 years ago
It's impossible to be a supporter for teams that are in close competition. Like being a Utd. Fan and a Barca fan. You can have a soft spot for one but you've got to make a choice at some point
Araz (Queens Park Rangers) 4 years ago
Most of this article is tongue in cheek and meant to be a little silly, there are no hard fast rules, just opinions. But I promise you that as a season ticket holder I have sat proudly with many who could cover all of these suggestions with ease
Ant (Liverpool) 4 years ago
If these were laws and not commandments, Man United would have almost no fans
Fxate (Manchester United) 4 years ago
But every single Liverpool, Chelsea, Arsenal fan would remain the same.    Give me a f*****g break.
Redsince63 (Manchester United) 4 years ago
And Manchester is blue of course ! Get off your horse matey ! 90% of the north west is divided between 4 teams, that's a pretty big fan base, trouble is with the living conditions of a lot of these supporters they just don't have the cash to go to games !.

As for the post i've followed these commandments all my life !
Rubin (Inter Milan) 4 years ago
Calm down United fans. I'm sure he's just joking. Lol
Matt (Footytube Staff) 4 years ago
Of course it's a joke.    Otherwise coming from an Irishman living in New Zealand this statement would appear to be a tad 'rich'.
Ant (Liverpool) 4 years ago
"coming from an Irishman living in New Zealand" who has grandparents from Liverpool

Plus I've been to Anfield loads of times
Mdereje (Arsenal) 4 years ago
Haha "If these were laws and not commandments, Man United would have almost no fans"  So true. Barca would also has much less fans
Borg (Manchester United) 4 years ago
Ant, the United hatred has been particularly strong recently. What gives?
Ant (Liverpool) 4 years ago
Purely a reaction to the literally constant anti-Liverpool hate posts I have to clean up daily from the very vocal new wave of United fans. Seems to me the least experienced and least knowledgeable of them are the loudest, but then again I'm told empty vessels make the most noise
ScouserDan (Liverpool) 4 years ago
Man UTD fans are some of the most loyal around.... Not like there going to switch to sky blue once City win the premiere league lol
Redsince63 (Manchester United) 4 years ago
@Ant theres always been strong feelings between the 2 sets of genuine supporters but like you said a lot of the new kids jump on the bandwagon something for which the older supporters (me self include) are partly to blame.
But the trolling on opposing teams chats doesn't help either and I'm sure you'll be the first to agree that theres a lot of s**t that finds its way to the United page
Ant (Liverpool) 4 years ago
I agree it does go both ways, and I had a good constructive chat with Borg about it last night for about half an hour. Believe me, the very last thing I want to have to do with my free time is to clear up hatred and warn people for it, anywhere on the site.

All I can say is what I experience day to day, and in my opinion (plus based on the volume of stuff we have to clean up), the bulk of it comes from the new United fans. Its a numbers game. A successful team gets bandwagon fans, as you say. These are guys that started supporting a club within the last couple of years, and they are instantly told that they are supposed to hate Liverpool and its fans with a burning spite. I'm not sure how many of them could point to Liverpool on a map.

I obviously don't want puppies and roses but the level of absolute hatred is shocking sometimes. All the klan stuff is frankly as offensive to me as calling a German a nazi. It's ignorant, inflammatory, and poisonous
Silverheart (Manchester United) 4 years ago
I've supported Man United for the last 16 years during my life of 21 years, as well as having a local club to support, and I'm not told to hate/spite supporters of any teams, mainly because I don't live in England.

But I have at least four close friends who are Liverpool supporters, another bunch who support Arsenal and Chelsea, the most we do is random banter and making fun of negative performances and misfiring strikers ;p
Matt (Footytube Staff) 4 years ago
'Banter' is one of the better things about watching and caring about football. When it is done with humour and intelligence it can be awesome but a lot of people think simply flaming opposing teams is what passes as banter these days, such a shame
ScouserDan (Liverpool) 4 years ago
I remember a United fan who's display picture was 3 Klu Klux Klan members with the LFC logo photoshopped onto it. And people wonder why the rivalry is boiling over and reaching new dangerous levels
Ant (Liverpool) 4 years ago
Exactly Dan, if United had a problem with Bayern Munich, would it be acceptable to post pictures of dubbed in Nazi flags over the Bayern players, or to have a 'cut out and keep' nazi armband in the United fanzines? Of course not. It's just pure ignorant hatred at the lowest level
Redsince63 (Manchester United) 4 years ago
@Ant, agreed the klan stuff has gone to far that's one of the negative feedbacks caused by the ongoing situation the whloe thing shouldn't have been allowed to carry on as long as it did.
But yeh that's past history, maybe you could intruduce a yellow red card system for trolling with an automatic 1 month ban from the site, anybody who's açtive would maybe think twice?
Just a thought!
Ant (Liverpool) 4 years ago
Not a bad idea P, and the yellow/red card idea was one I suggested on day 1 of being a mod! The reason we didn't was because we reckoned trollers would try to collect them like asbo's. We have it simplified now. Three strikes (warning on wall) and you're out. Racism/Homophobia is an instant ban but constant trolling will make those warnings add up

We're working on a couple of other ways to try to automate anti-troll measures. One suggestion is that people who repeatedly troll start to lose their abilities. No dreamfooty first, then no posting to team/match chats, then no posting anywhere etc. A sliding scale
Redsince63 (Manchester United) 4 years ago
^^^ I rest me case and leave it youze (the mods) capable hands ! Good luck lol
CapitanoAzzurro (Inter Milan) 4 years ago
Looks like a lot "fans" in footytube are going to fan hell. It must be filling up with fake Barcelona supporters right now
SrpskiCevap (Inter Milan) 4 years ago
Bandwagoners, they're everywhere. Barcelona were dominating and it's easy to be a fan of Barcelona. They can drool over Messi and Xavi all day and not worry about a thing
ManOnDMoon (Manchester City) 4 years ago
A nice mix of serious and hilarious here. It depends whether you're a supporter or a fan. "Supporter" isn't a strong enough word, "fanatic" is. "Fan" doesn't follow any logic of family relations, good behaviour or geography. Fan is next to insanity. What makes you drive across Europe a few days before an exam.... For a match you don’t even have tickets for? What makes you bungee jump off a bridge wearing your team shirt? Could be fun to have a “Fan Tales” footytube thread.
One commandment could be: don’t be biased. They say no player is bigger than the club, it should also be true that no club is bigger than football. To be a fan is, ultimately, to be a football fan
Borg (Manchester United) 4 years ago
Wow I fully agree. Nice post!
Araz (Queens Park Rangers) 4 years ago
Interesting view. Like I tend to think the two "fan" and "supporter" are different no matter which way you look at it in one of them you can break all of the rules above, but in the other situation most of them apply
Donnchadh (Liverpool) 4 years ago
Ah I love the passion of this post. Cheer me up a bit from the Liverpool loss, makes me want to puke less. Fanatic is a strong word. So though some of this is ridiculous it's pretty much true to an extent. True fans or ultras, all these rules probably apply. I don't know if I can claim all of these bud I do my best. All I know is I stayed home so I could catch the game at 5:30 was going to go to a Pink Floyd laser show tonight. Usually I will try not to let the Liverpool result effect me too much if it is a loss(does anyway a lot of the time) of course if it is a win I am on a high all day. But today I think I will just suffer and mallow in the mire and not do s**t all weekend, not even go to the creek this weekend just blow off all my engagements get my friends pissed and be pissed myself haha.

How in the f**k did we lose that match. I want to put on the Red shirt I could pop some in, would be the best moments of my life, tell me I wouldn't play like an absolute f*****g beast

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