You are awesome mate

---
19 - Poem from our Europa League win!
---

(once your familier with the poem read it with the music as well)

[1]
When Cardozo scored I could hear those Arsenal fans lurking
11 Trophies in 10 years, I think this interim thing is working

Just like the final last year its the Blue against the Reds
We may not have Didier Drogba but we have Fernando Torres

What a 2nd half he had, created a goal from virtually nothing
Dummied two defenders and had the camera and crowd buzzing

He muscled off Luisao and raced down deeper and deeper
One does not simply let Torres one on one against the keeper

Edged the keeper and slotted it home brilliantly with his shoe
Shades of euro 2008 and his champions league goal at camp nou

Benfica tried to walk it in as many times as possible
And when you play like Arsenal you win as much as Arsenal


[Chorus]
Lampard with his brilliant effort that would'v made the front page
I swear if he scored that you would need to restrict me in some sort of cage

He will continue to lay his experience to our youngsters backstage
He is like a fine wine, getting better with age


[2]
I know Dave was at fault for that pen but I want to back my amigo
Remember that crucial intervention when Cardozo laid the ball to Rodrigo

Ramires was very poor that game but he was a real performer
He made that brilliant run to get us that stoppage time corner

Chelsea have scored three goals in European finals in two years
All assisted by Juan Mata, this man deserves multiple cheers

As he crossed in the ball to where the big Serbian pounced
How many important goals has Ivan scored? I'v simply lost count

Benfica ran out of steam in the 2nd half looking so lifeless
Winning the competition that we forced Spurs to play in....Priceless

And what about at the end with Cahil's brilliant Cardozo deception
Forget match saving, it was a trophy winning interception


[Chorus]
Other fans saying we were outclassed and didn't deserved that Europa League gem
There is only one way to outclass a team and that's to score more goals than them

Despite the controversies in our transitional season we ended on a high
'Its usually drama with Chelsea but there's always a trophy to remember it by'

;)

Read it with this music
Https://soundcloud.Com/bluffmaster20012/instrumental-2
(start at 21 sec, read Chorus slightly faster)

Here are my general Football Poems (I might start it back up again when the new season starts)


Link: www.footytube.com/forums/funny-football/bluffmaste...

You can make them into raps and get YouTube famous lol

In the future could you leave comments on my wall rather then in this thread just because when I put up a new poem and someone replies here the poem won't be seen

Thanks for all the love and support on the poems

Archive Poem (from our 6-1 win over QPR in 2012)
--------------------------------------------------
I managed to dig up a very old poem of mine (might be one my firsts), I wrote this right after our 6-1 game vs QPR and just before our FA cup final match, who knew something silly would turn into a hobby that I would do regularly (some of those things are still true lol)


Link: www.footytube.com/news/guardian/fernando-torres-in...

Just scroll down a bit and u'll see it, srry to any pool fans in advance ;)

Great work man

---
18 - Poem/Rap from our game against West Ham
---

(once your familiar with the poem/rap read it with the music as well)

[1]
With Torres becoming batman and taking the day off
Ba and Cahil returned with Moses hoping to gloss

Race for top 2 opened as City fell thick and thin
As Arsenal beat Swansea, our game was a must win


[Chorus]
Take yourself a picture when your at our lovely ground
Wether your sitting up or down I'm just repping for my town.

Off a lovely green pitch that's not faded off to Brown
As your greeted by the people your sitting all around.

See that Liquidator when It starts hear the sound.
When your wearing something blue you don't need a cap or gown

But the guys in my class who forgot to fill on gas
Be at all the f*ckin games grabbin seats off the ground


[2]
Torres's recent form is turning me into a believer
And wtf Ba, don't tell me you'v caught his fever

Hazard crossed in the ball with finess and delicacy
Which Lampard headed in so bloody excellently

Fans goin mad at the stadium home and pub
As Super Frankie enters the double century club

What an honour to be part of a club so exclusive
Chelsea fans were singing and Hammers were bieng abusive

(take a breather lol and continue at 1.44)

When they started throwing coins at Lampard on the sidelines
I thought to myself 'Why doesn't our board do this likewise'

Hazard lighting up our team and making thiers look grim
One does not simply stop Hazard without tripping him

West ham decided to gang up on him with 2 men
He laughed off ran and rabona'ed right past them

Gliding on forward he scores a goal many would daydream
Cause scoring simple goals is just too mainstream

Hazard is ahead of Kagawa and il give you my reason
He scored 5 in 8 while kagawa scored 5 all season

Hammer fans mocked us while we sat back all cozy
John Terry mocked them back by lifting a trophy


[Chorus]
Take yourself a picture when your at our lovely ground
Wether your sitting up or down I'm just repping for my town.

Off a lovely green pitch that's not faded off to Brown
As your greeted by the people your sitting all around.

See that Liquidator when It starts hear the sound.
When your wearing something blue you don't need a cap or gown

But the guys in my class who forgot to fill on gas
Be at all the f*ckin games grabbin seats off the ground

;)

Read/Rap it with this music
Https://soundcloud.Com/bluffmaster20012/rap-instrumental
(start at 28 sec, read chorus slightly faster)

Ok I wanted to do this for a long time so lets hope it works. And also apologies for picking 'Call me maybe' as the first song I try this with lol

So what I did was make up a small amount of lyrics that resembled the lyrics of 'Call Me Maybe'

Steps
----------
1. Play this youtube video and start singing my lyrics with the blue Karaoke highlighter on the video



Lyrics
---------
Hazard gives West Haaam hell
Hows the bench Shinjin do tell
Looked at city as spuuurs fell
Cause now you're in our way

I'd trade Benayoun for a fish
Fans giving Lampard the kiss
Getting 2nd is my wish
But City's in our way

Berbatov was showin,
Spurs lost, my face was glowin
Lampard leaving? What you blowin?
Where you think you're going, baby?

Hey I just met you
And this is crazy
I've scored 200
So contract maybe

Its easy to look riiiight
Past Spurs baaaby
Thanks for 3rd spot
Now f*ck off maybe

Hey I just met you
And this is crazy
I've scored 200
So contract maybe

Its easy to look riiiight
Past Spurs baaaby
Thanks for 3rd spot
Now f*ck off maybe

;)

---
16th - After Our 3-1 Win vs. Bucharest
---

Chelsea kicked off with Torres and Terry returing
Mazacar also started, hoping to do a first leg overturning

Started the match off patiently, not much attacking or flair
Cech bailed us out early as spurs survive san siro scare

Hazard was phenomenal, destroying their right back from all directions
Cole was equally brilliant with his tackling and match saving interceptions

Mata and Ramires combined to score a goal that was rather slick
Bucherest would then score a sloppy goal off a sh*tty corner kick

Half time was here and the atmosphere around the bridge was very heated
With us needing 2 goals to progress another brilliant second half perfomance was needed

We came out guns blazing as Hazard won a free kick that made Bucharest feel even more threatened
Mata delievered the cross which was powerfully headed in by our Captain Leader and Legend

Chelsea would continue to wreak havoc as Hazard pretty much retired thier right back
Torres would then score from a Hazardous assist and no I'm not delusional or even slightly on crack

He doesn't always score but when he does, he guarantees that our team has qualified
For the last 20 minutes he became the player that once used to be a threat worldwide

Madird face Galatasaray, two Legends will be squaring off on this day
Drogba vs Mourinho, who did you think I was going to say?

;)

---
15th - After Our 2-2 Draw Against Man Utd.
---

Before the United game not many were optimistic and expected a good result
Thinking this might be the year a team puts an end to our FA Cup assault

An interesting linup was selected considering the game's at Old Trafford
Cahil was partnering Luiz and there was no John Terry or Eden Hazard

Chicarito superbly heads the opening goal to put United infront
Seems to always score against us that little pea or should I say little c*nt

United would then convert a free kick scored by none other our friendly neighborhood Shrek
At this point we were like "Waiter just fk off and don't forget to collect your cheque"

After going 2 goals ahead Utd fans thought 'lets score 5 before the half was even up'
But the funny thing is after this period of time Chelsea of 3-4 months ago finally woke up

Actually you know what that last line was poor so scratch it, il get back to it later
Chelsea piled on serious pressure and thier threats seem to only get greater

The second half started and for the first time Rafa actually managed
Sending out Hazard and pushing Ramires forward to hopefully cause more damage

Hazard scored a beauty and suddenly we were the danger team instead
Who else noticed the ridiculous things the Fox commentator said?

Saying stuff like 'why isn't Rio even considered for the England job'
Well why don't you watch the Torres incident and U'll see you brainless Knob

Anyways, United lost the ball and we were on the break
Ramires got the ball and started to overtake
He cuts back on his left and De Gea starts to shake
Ramires curls the ball into the net as the Earth begins to quake
Milk is served Manchester, would you like some corn flakes?
Ladies and Gentleman, Mr. Rambo is finally awake!

(pause, and lol at the random corn flakes line)

Finished on a high, maybe should'v actually won as we completly bossed that half
Its funny to think how 45 minutes can turn an angry frown into a laugh

United will come to London and hopefully a clean and thrilling game will be produced
Shouldn't for a second be overconfident but this game will have been a huge boost

After going 2 goals ahead Utd fans thought 'lets score 5 before the half was even up'
I laughed off and said 'bitch please, one does not simply beat Chelsea in the FA Cup'

;)

Chelsea's blue  I love blue  Chelsea FC  I love you      

---
14th - After Our 2-1 Win Against Arsenal
---


January is a great month as it brings you football and the transfers
This weekend had another Super Sunday ending with United facing Spurs

One team got denied a penalty and got scored on in Fergie time with a beauty
That team was United! (and I thought stuff like this only happened in the movies)

But the performance truly belonged to Spurs who simply outclassed United that game
While Utd defended very well, thier attacking was not the same

The point certainly brought City a bit closer in this intriguing title race
Van Persie scored a good goal, marked by 2 defenders and still finding space
Lennon too was very destructive with his dribbling and lighting pace
And you can always count on Dempsey to score against Utd even if it wasn't a brace

And ofcourse It wouldn't be complete without Fergie abusing the official like he had commited a theft
Saying that the official had an Anti United agenda, which is wierd cause I thought there weren't any left



Newcastle lost after going up, leaving thier fans simply horrified
Reading seem to be winning without playing well, mark of a championship winning side

Liverpool hosted Norwich who were simply pawns to pool's army of Queens if it were a game of Chess
Sturrige didn't get a proper chance at Chelsea but us fans never wanted him gone as he had potential to success

(pause)

I'm betting Arsenal fans are depressed from this weekend's play
Cause Chamack won't get to play against them this comming Wednesday
Lol you thought I was gonna' say cause chelsea made them pay?
Naaaa I think the former is worse then the latter, don't you say?

I read an article somewhere that said Wenger fined his players for breaking his rules and yes it is as funny as it sounds
One was 'non attendance of unused arsenal players at home matches without permission is 1000 pounds'

Another was illegal use of flipflops, yet I still wear them while playing cricket
But seriously 1000 pounds, Its almost as much what Arsenal fans pay for thier ticket



Good to see that Cole signed a new deal, I'm sure that's what everyone wanted
It was even better to see a 2 goal lead not go t*ts up at 'Rafa's Restuarante'

So Guardiola went to Munich, bringing with him his 'tiki taka' USB that we'v all sort of forgotten
If he's gonna' insert that in Bayern he's gonna' need to install some anti virus and quarantine robben

;)

---
13th - After Our 4-2 Win At Tottenham
---

The first game in and already more exciting then the internationals as a whole
Liverpool win at home, and another Manchester club scores another late goal

So Bale was having a baby, for both him and Chelsea this was magical
It must've been awkard for him seeing Wenger and Terry at the hospital



Chelsea won at the lane, last time they did I had farely small kneecaps
If you missed the game (god knows why) il give you some very quick recaps

Cahil opened the scoring, hitting the ball so hard Friedal nearly bled
Then Gallas equalised, from a set piece redirected through his head
Lennon then scuffed a shot which Defoe poached, spurs were now ahead
Mata would then score through a crowd, shifting the momentum to us instead
He went on to score another, from a Hazard pass that couldn't be read
Mata would then destroy Walker and assist Sturridge to put this game to bed

Outclassed Spurs today with flicks tricks back heels and more gloss
London is blue not white, It will take them a while 2-4get this loss

We all praised Mata alot but there's another who is also 'Juan' of a kind
If you don't know who I'm taking about you Petr Cech between the line

One thing I gotta' give credit to AVB for.... Now hear me out before you reject
He bought Cahil and Mata while at chelsea, to score against him today Respect

And how can I forget Arsenal's loss against a team beaten 4-1 by you know who
No no, that's too kind.... They were beaten by a side liverpool thrashed 5-2

;)

--
12th - Chelsea vs Tottenham Preview Poem
--


Put your damn Fifa 13 and other pointless topics to bed
Club football is back baby! Lets all watch that instead
Spurs, Shaktar 2 games against Utd, quite a tough looking spread
Its not that its hard it just all came at once.... (pause).... That's what she said


Ok so now onto some facts about our game against Spurs
They are unbeaten in 9 matches, certaintly no ametuers

Bale has had 12 shots on target this season, will be a handfull for Bane
Spurs have lost just 2 times in thier last 22 games at White Hart Lane

We are yet pay in the second quarter, not kidding you can check our receipts
We have the best defensive record, conceding 4 goals and keeping 4 clean sheets

Lampard could make his 500th start for us
The man's a legend, this needs no furthur discuss

We need to watch out for Spur's counterattack, Luiz needs to stay alert
Cauker's inexperience could pave spaces for Torres who cd cause some hurt

I think it will be a close entertaining match and 1 team may not dominate the other
We've already beaten 1 london club this season, lets go out and beat another


Not too many Jabs at the Spurs in this one, il save that for after the game (hopefully)

;)